This is perhaps the fourth year I've done this, so just like Uncle George getting drunk before dinner and falling asleep at the table, you just need to get used to it and be thankful it only happens once a year. And if you are new to Hidden City, I hope you enjoy William S. Burroughs reading his routine, A Thanksgiving Prayer

For those of a less cynical inclination, here's a recipe. I am not much of a cook, but there are two things I make well, butter cookies, and cranberry sauce. Here is the current incarnation of the latter, which I will be bringing to my father's home later today. When I brought it to work for a party, even friends who don't like the taste of cranberries unless there's vodka involved wanted the recipe.

Spiced Cranberry Sauce, 2005 Edition

1 bag whole cranberries, rinsed
1 cup white sugar
1 cup dark rum
1 tablespoon orange zest
2 tablespoons grated crystallized ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
1 cinnamon stick

Put everything but the cranberries into a fairly large pot and bring it to a boil, stirring frequently. Keep stirring for a minute or two, until you are sure all the sugar is dissolved, then add the rinsed cranberries a handful at a time until they are all in the pot.

Stir occasionally until the liquid returns to a boil. You will see the skins of the berries start to split, and may even get some popping, so watch out for burning sugary napalm. Turn the heat down to medium low, cover the pot, and let it simmer for ten minutes or so, stirring occasionally.

Turn off the burner and allow the sauce to cool to room temperature in the pot on the stove, covered. This will take a couple of hours. Once it has cooled completely it will have the consistency of preserves.

Transfer it to another container, removing the cinnamon stick when you find it. Refrigerate it overnight, and you've now got a little over two cups of cranberry sauce.

Tips from personal experience

• Use a pot with high side, because as this starts to turn into something resembling syrup it will bubble up like mad.
• Don't get in a hurry and transfer it directly from the heat to the fridge. It will never set properly.
• I used dried orange zest and it works fine, but you'll get better results with fresh. If you are using the dried variety, throw in a couple of tablespoons of orange juice.
• If you have leftovers, it freezes very nicely. It also makes a surprisingly good peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
• Resist the urge to take a deep whiff of the pre-cranberry mixture as it is boiling. While it will smell wonderful, you will also get a snoot full of alcohol vapor.

Happy thanksgiving to my American friends, and happy Thursday to the Canadians and Bavarians in the crowd.